The insult continuum

There are many elements to making a good commercial, but none are as important as insulting the consumer in just the right fashion. To the untrained eye it may seem as though ads belittle, insult, and put down consumers without rhyme or reason, but in reality, there is a strict set of protocols to be followed.

Men: Of course, men are always fair game. You can insult men as much as you want under any circumstance. This is especially true of fathers. Nothing is quite as stupid as fathers.

Women: This is far trickier. Mothers can be insulted by teens, but never by their husbands. One woman can insult another, providing the woman being insulted is not the one buying the product being advertised.

Teens: A teenage girl will always show up a teenage boy, but both can make fools of their parents.

Age: The older they get, the funnier and more idiotic they get, isn’t that right? Pretty well any person over the age of 40 is fair game, but the male/female standard still holds: an older woman can only be put down by another woman, but anyone can make fun of the older man.

It’s a pretty simple process, and most ad agencies seem to understand the principle quite well. Special kudos, however, go to  DraftFCB for its unremitting display of Old Man Bashing in the TD Bank commercials.

And I’m sure I’m alone in seriously thinking of switching my account away from the TD bank. It probably just proves I’m a grumpy old man.